The days seemed to be getting shorter. The nights,longer.
Winter was back. So were the chilly winds. The blankets were out and so were the heaters.
Everything was just the way it should have been. The way it always had been.
“But isn’t something missing?” I asked myself. Something was.
That night I had an overwhelming urge to sleep. It was surprising,though,considering the fact that insomnia and I had a bond that was older than life itself. I figured something was wrong. Or maybe it wasn’t. Trying to fight sleep when you try to lure it every night is hard. So after battling sleep,for what seemed like eternity,I let myself slip.
I woke up not much later. But everything was different. Everything was bright. This was not my room!I had traveled to a whole new world. A world where I was happy.Sleepy.Hungry.Me. It hadn’t been this way in a very long time. I looked around and it was the most splendid sight ever. The grass was green with dew on it. The trees were laden with leaf and fruit. The birds were chirping the happiest of songs. I heard a stream. The wind rustled through my hair,playing with it.
- The breeze was sweet with the scent of…Happiness? I guess.
I took off my shoes and felt the grass tingling my feet. The dew wetting it. I closed my eyes and spread my arms and smiled. Goosebumps. A chill running through my body. The good kind.I ruffled my hair and ran. Ran like I never had. Taking in all the things I had cut myself off from. The grass,the dew,the breeze,the song,the beauty. I felt as if Life was smiling at me.
I seemed to be alone. But I felt someone there. A presence. A quite exciting one,at that.
You know the feeling when you are drawn to something? That was what it was. Some one pulling me towards themselves. I don’t know. But in that moment,that second, I knew it was going to be amazing. There was no way this could go wrong. I kept moving in the direction.
All of a sudden,everything turned dark. Pitch black. Nothing could be seen. I looked around,hoping to find some light. None was found. I had jinxed it. This one perfect journey to some place,obviously, more happy than where I was from and I had jinxed it. As my eyes got accustomed to the darkness,they started making out figures. Not human ones. Something completely different. They were huge and all around me. All you could see were their eyes. Blood-shot,evil eyes,burdening me with their unflinching gaze. All of a sudden,I felt conscious of myself. They were closing in on me. It felt suffocating. The new-found happiness I had held within me was fast disappearing. My feet wobbled,my head spun,my thoughts were demented.
“Run”,said a voice,”as fast as you can. Don’t think. RUN!”
“No. Enough with the running. Fight. FIGHT!” said another voice.
Yes. It was time to fight. I rushed towards one of them and tackled it with all I had. He fell,broke and disappeared.I got up and rushed to tackle another one. The same happened. All pumped up,I charged for the third who picked me up mid-pace and slammed me to the ground.
“Get up. Get up now!” said the voice that urged me to fight.
I obeyed. And charged again. Winning this time.The others began to back off.
Moments later,the light was back. They were gone,whatever they were. Everything was bright again.
And then,something happened. Some one materialized.Out of thin air. She was fair,with black hair,brown eyes. She was divine. And she was coming to me.
“You are finally here,huh?” she asked.
“Where exactly are we?” I questioned,puzzled and bedazzled at the same time.
Me: “No,seriously. Where am I?”
Her:”Inside your head,really”,she smiled
Me: “You are?”
Me: “And those were…?”
Me: “Why didn’t you help me?”
“You ever heard of someone’s life figuring itself out? Rarely,right? Because no ones life is perfect. Not yours. See these scars?” she asked as she pointed to the scars on her wrists,”These are the imperfections. We all have them. You know how you can change them?”
“Fight your demons.”
“Hit them hard. When you fall,get up,dust yourself and hit them again. They will lose,eventually. Just try. Try hard enough and you will win. In the end,you always do”
“What if I lose in the end?”
“If you lose,it’s not the end”
The sights disappeared. I was back in my room. Wide awake.
Morning was here.
And I was looking forward to it.
More than that,I was looking forward for the night.
Because I knew she would be back.
Back for another lesson.